PmWiki | Stuff / Gennysys

In the beginning was God. The first thing God actuallly created rather than just pondering about stuff was boredom, or we wouldn't be here discussing things. So God made a little solar system with a sun, a planet, a moon and some sprinkled points of lights in case she felt like making other stars later.

That was fun for a bit. After solving the 3-body problem, God simulated a few billion years of evolution in her head, which took a few days in real time according to the planet's orbital parameters, then sprinkled the results on said planet and watched them go. That was also fun for a bit.

Then God made a boy and a girl, thus indirectly inventing vanilla porn a few hours later. Watching it turn as less vanilla as two people with no technology could make was also fun for a bit. And things kept running with little intervention on God's part. Mostly she wanted to be surprised, that was after all the whole point, but the whole simple ecosytem was at equilibrium.

So she came up with a challenge. "This is an apple; it's yummy; I'm going to specifically tell you to not eat it, and ask you to make a moral decision about whether it's right to listen to me on this one or not. Listening is the easy choice, for what it's worth."

After the girl did a few interesting things with an agreeable snake, thus inventing tentacle porn, and got the boy to laugh at the situation instead of feeling left out by pretending to have a serious conversation with the snake during and right afterward, the two kept up the serious conversation and figured that the right thing to do was thus: if God made the world because she wanted to see interesting things, then gave them one interesting thing to try, clearly she wants them to also see interesting things.

So they made a bit of a game of picking the apples while trying to not being seen, which didn't work, because God has wallhack. And God smiled, and gave them what some lazy bonehead centuries later decided had to be a curse.

"You've made a moral choice, so I grant you grownupness."

"You don't get consequence-free sex anymore, but you get to feel the joy of parenting and eventually the strength of manifest destiny."

"You don't get to just subsist on abundant local resources anymore, but you get the to experience the power of industry, of remaking the world with your hands."

"You don't get to live in simple bliss anymore, but you get to expand your curiosity until it reaches out as far as I've made."

"And then one day if you're clever enough you'll have what you had here back, earned instead of given, and it'll feel a lot nicer just because of that."

"Now excuse me, I have to make a vast and wonderful cosmos for you to indulge your curiosity in, before one of your great great grandkids invents a telescope. See if you can catch me working."